Home > Leftovers > An open letter to Microsoft from a new user of Office 2007

An open letter to Microsoft from a new user of Office 2007

Dear Dickfaces Microsoft,

As a longtime Microsoft Office User, I wanted to provide some honest feedback on the latest clusterfuck release of the Office suite of applications. I was one of the sacrificial lambs chosen few who upgraded to Office 2007 in my office. And even though you’ve been flooded with complaints about this abomination comments and suggestions, I thought I’d provide some additional insight.

Let me give you some context. I’m what most people would call a “power user,” which means that I figured out a bunch of workarounds know a tremendous amount about Word, Excel, PowerPoint, etc. It’s the only way that I can do my work as a spin doctor liar guy PR professional. So, I hope you take that into account when you disregard this outright listen to my complaint.

First, let’s talk about the decision to replace the standard “File, Edit, View…” menu with new groupings on something called a “Ribbon” at the top of the window. I mean, what the hell? Are you serious? Why do you want to alienate the vast majority of computer users out there who are comfortable with the old setup? Are you kidding me? I mean, for the love of all that is good and holy, that’s the dumbest thing I’ve read lately that didn’t involve the Bush administration. And who the hell calls this a ribbon? Am I a 6 year old girl? Holy hell, this must be what a ‘roid rage feels like. Jesus, Mary and Joseph, you guys have just lost it. I have several comments about this new feature, I guess, but the main one is: it’s difficult to learn. I miss the old setup, and I can’t figure out the advantages to the new version. Then again, you did bring us Microsoft Bob, so anything’s possible.

Another new aspect is the decision to make it downright impossible difficult to convert files into PDFs. I can understand that the old Adobe Acrobat integration made too much sense caused some problems. Microsoft has always wanted to own the world have control over as much as possible, but the inability to do this basic task has left me so goddamned pissed off I almost started speaking in tongues downright frustrated.

Thank goodness you provided a separate patch for the PDF issue. Your always substandard easy-to-access help feature helped me locate it earlier today, and I immediately felt less rage better.

Oh, and I had the opportunity to peruse PowerPoint last week, and I found some things that were pretty interesting if your standards are very, very low. There were a few nice options for making graphics more 3D. Seriously, that’s all I can come up with. Dumbasses.

But, for PowerPoint and all of the other applications, I’ve had some problems with backward compatability of files. So, when I save a file originally created in Office 2003 and then update it in Office 2007, it seems to always want to save it in the newest version. That infuriates the living hell out of me, because I have to do a “Save As” at the end of my edits and I often forget, so forget about file-sharing is awkward.

There are several other features that I could rant about all day caught my attention, but I think you see the point. You suck suck suck suck suck have some work to do. But, I’ll be using the product because I have to regardless. Eat shit and die. Many thanks!

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