Home > TV > Lost blog chronicles, part 2

Lost blog chronicles, part 2

Back to tonight’s episode of Lost.

9:30:24 PM – Coming soon on ABC. David Blaine acts like he’s going to kill himself on TV again. He’s like David Copperfield, just less flamboyant.

9:30:44 PM – Flashback to Sydney. Anna wants to know why drunk guy is here. That dude is a real mess.

9:32:25 PM – As drunk dude gets out of the car, his door hits a pedestrian. It kinda looked like Sawyer. I’m sure there are hundreds of other bloggers out there typing in the same thing.

9:33:00 PM – OK, Anna and Sawyer did it! Oooooooooo! Anna: “You tell anyone about this, I’ll kill you.” Awww, she’s sweet.

9:34:05 PM – Is this the chick that Hurley has a crush on? She’s cute.

9:34:19 PM – Yes, it is. Wow.

9:35:09 PM – I think the girl digs Hurley! Good work my friend. You’ll be dating about 15 levels above your station.

9:35:43 PM – Michael’s waking up. He’s got a terrific headache. He says, “I found them.”

9:36:53 PM – He’s describing the Others, who live in tents and tee-pees. They eat dried fish. There are 22 of them. Are the lost folks being pursued by a group of Inuit Indians?

9:37:55 PM – The Others have a hatch! That might be important!

9:38:25 PM – Michael: “We are going to get my boy back.” Yeah, you said that during the other episode I saw. You’re not bringing a lot to the table, dude.

9:40:45 PM – I liked the other episode better. Besides Hurley, there’s nothing to this one that I’d find remotely memorable. The flashbacks with Anna are horrible.

9:42:57 PM – Man, this is one long set of commercials. Sawyer could have made five or six more lame statements during this time. Anna could have blandly delivered several dozen lines. We’re wasting my time, people.

9:44:22 PM – John and Jack debate the merits of attacking the Others.

9:44:38 PM – Man, I’d pay anything to have a nice A-Team “getting ready for battle” montage right now.

9:46:09 PM – Oh, Hurley so screwed up this romantic date. No blankets… got them lost on the way to the beach… sweet!

9:48:10 PM – OK, Anna Lucia is going to shoot Henry?

9:49:10 PM – Henry knows stuff about Anna. Some guy named Goodwin told him. Is that the drunk dude, maybe?

9:50:30 PM – Before she pulls the trigger, we’re headed to commercial. Should I be a bit more involved than I am right now? I mean, Wendy’s is promoting a new chicken sam’mich right now, and it’s more spellbinding than this.

9:51:18 PM – Here’s my problem. The actress who plays Anna Lucia has about as much on-screen charisma as a coconut. She couldn’t carry this episode in a wheelbarrow.

9:53:07 PM – I can see why people like to debate about the meaning of this show. Are they truly lost? In purgatory? Part of a government cover-up? Luckily, I don’t care.

9:55:06 PM – Another long commercial. Jeez.

9:56:04 PM – Flashback to Anna in the Sydney airport. The other folks from the crash are watching Jack beg to get on a plane.

9:56:33 PM – Anna is trying to act! Yuck!

9:56:52 PM – Wait, her mom was the police boss who offered her a way out?

9:57:19 PM – Did Anna Lucia happen to have a passport with her at the airport? How did she get to Sydney? Has anyone else thought about that?

9:58:35 PM – OK, Anna couldn’t shoot Henry? Oh, she’s acting again. That looks a little like emotion! Kudos!

9:59:40 PM – Yes, yes Michael. We know. The Others took your son. We got it!

10:00:33 PM – OK, Michael shot Anna! That was a bit unexpected. Guess he doesn’t like bad acting, either. And he shot Hurley’s girl! Damn! That was just cold-blooded!

10:01:51 PM – And then Michael shoots himself in the arm. I guess what we learned is that Michael has turned to the Others. Whatever.

OK, my theory. This is a show about a reality show gone wrong. The Others are the producers and crew. The lost folks are unwittingly the participants in the show. The reality show took a turn for the worse when the props guy gave everyone live ammo. See… it works!

Sure, it’s lame, but does any other explanation make sense? Maybe Michael will off some people next week. I’ll be watching… other stuff.

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Categories: TV
  1. treasserign
    December 19, 2008 at 4:23 pm

    Thanks the author!

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